Yes, we Kean. The centre-forward who leaves Fiorentina and discovers that anything goes in football these days

These days, anything goes in the name of a whim. A footballer plays the hero whenever he fancies it, letting the bad times be forgotten. Even if karma eventually strikes those who are ambitious and play by no rules. As happened to Koopmainers, who suddenly declared himself unfit for Atalanta – complete with a medical certificate – simply because he’d now set his sights on Juventus. Only to find himself today having gone from star to bit-part player, with karma chasing him like a snake disguised as a viper. Anything goes these days, even ending up on the transfer market with a grimace of regret, only to discover that that grimace was nothing but hope. The same pattern was evident in the case of Kean, newly signed by Como after a whirlwind week. Released by Fiorentina after failing to score a single goal for Juventus, the Italy international striker—undeterred by having spent a disastrous year with few goals, many mysterious trips and a perpetually inflamed shinbone, yet earning six million net in wages, the highest in Fiorentina’s history—has begun to show signs of restlessness.

He woke up one morning, his face swollen, feeling sluggish, headed off late to Viola Park and said, ‘No, I’m not training.’ From that moment on, the circus tent opened, full of tightrope walkers. Fiorentina fined him; he endured it in silence, already knowing how the story would end. Because by now it’s all in the hands of the players, at least the top ones. They sign million-euro contracts and then eat them back, munching them like crispbread. Fiorentina were complicit; there’s no doubt about it. Paratici wanted to sell him, considering him unreliable. Kean could have complained about this (I’m being hypocritical) and would even have had a grain of truth in it (still being hypocritical). But he didn’t, dazzled by the reflection on Lake Como, where he evidently saw himself looking a little better. Because nobody wanted him at those prices – only Como did.

Kean is undoubtedly a strong player, but he plays his own game, with blinders on, which is quite at odds with the team spirit demanded by Fabregas. However, these are technical issues I am discussing in theory, fully aware that reality is quite another matter. What remains are these days, when we all seem like hamsters on a wheel. We run about in search of some logic, of a rule that is actually followed, in the name of a shred of consistency, but we’re chasing shadows. Because by now, everything is a spectacle: Fiorentina signing Zirkzee, the ‘Viola’ fans rejoicing, the Como supporters celebrating, and every agent on the planet leaning out of their balconies and shouting to the world: ‘Yes we Kean’.